Eldest: The blessings and burdens

Prompt: What’s your role in your family?

            In my family, I am the first of three children. I have a younger sister, who is two and a half years younger than me, and a younger brother, who is nine years younger than me. Being the firstborn, I received the most attention from my parents and family members growing up. Not only was I the firstborn, but I was also the first boy born on my mother’s side of the family. Due to this, everyone took a special interest in me and so I grew up with much more attention than my siblings. However, just as the saying goes, with great power (or in my case, privilege) comes great responsibility. I have found this to be true in my own family life.

            As the first born, I always got the best of everything. Whether it was attention or clothes or opportunities, everything was given to me by my parents. Even after my younger sister was born, I was the one who received more attention. My parents were so busy trying to open up all opportunities to me that I think my sister missed out on some of her own opportunities. Whether it was playing the piano, trying out baseball and soccer, swimming, ice skating, horse riding, or learning taekwondo, I was always given the opportunity by my parents to try out anything and everything. I always knew that my parents had sacrificed a lot for me to become the person that I am, but now I also realize that my siblings had to sacrifice a lot for my sake too, whether they wanted to or not. This isn’t my fault, nor is it my parents’ fault, as naturally the more children there are, the less attention each gets. And in many cases my sister also got to try out all these different things with me. However, I still take it upon myself to try and give to my siblings what I have received from my parents.

            Throughout my life, my parents have always given me their best. As the older brother, I have a responsibility to give my best to my siblings just as my parents did for me. My parents definitely provided a lot for my siblings as well, however my job is to fill in what my parents can’t do anymore. This is especially true for my younger brother, as he has a huge age gap between my sister and me. My parents are older now, and they can’t do all the things that they used to be able to do. So I took on some “parental” duties in my brother’s life. When he was growing up, I was my brother’s main playmate. I was the one who told him stories, played games with him, and entertained him. He would seek after me whenever he was bored, and we gained a really close relationship through this. When I was younger my parents always had time to play with me, but now that they are older I took on the responsibility to both take care of and play with my brother.

            As the oldest, I have received the most, but I also have the responsibility to give the most. I have learned through this process of giving that sacrifice is very hard. I understand more of what my parents’ must have felt like every day as I sacrifice my time to guide my siblings in their lives and provide for them what they need. Although being the oldest is sometimes hard and frustrating as you don’t have an older sibling to seek advice, and you always have to set a good example for your siblings, I enjoy and cherish both the privileges and the responsibilities that come with being the oldest.